The Stuff That Dreams are Made Of

~This was first published in our local support group’s newsletter back in 2007. I hope you enjoy it.

Have you ever had one of those vivid, crazy dreams that you’ll never forget?  I had the craziest dream ever last week.  It was so strange that the first time I told my husband about it, he thought I must have made it up!

I dreamt I was a contestant on a game show that was a cross between “Deal or no Deal” and “Jeopardy”.  I traded a new car for a 50/50 chance to win a house.  But not just any house– this was Charleston Heston’s own house!  It was a huge two-story mansion with hardwood floors, tons of marble and granite, a dream kitchen, a floor to ceiling fireplace in the living room, and a huge master bedroom with a fireplace and a balcony that overlooked the backyard.  This house sat on acreage, and came complete with a waterfall that emptied into a pristine pool, a cranberry bog, and a quarter size train circling the property.

But what crazy dream is complete without a dream come true?  I won the house!  My whole family got to meet Mr. Heston as he was busy packing up his house so we could move in.  He liked us so well that he gave us some memorabilia from the “Ten Commandments”.  The only bummer:  We had to move toNew Jersey.  I remember I was terrified of what their homeschool laws might be!  (I later found out that they are better than ours).

All of us have dreams.  Sometimes we remember our dreams, and sometimes we only have a vague idea of what our dreams really were.  Many times we try to apply some kind of meaning or message to our dreams, especially when they are as detailed and realistic as mine was. Many times a message does seem clear.

I’ve thought about dreams a lot lately- not just my own crazy dream, but also the whole idea of dreams in general. And as I was thinking about my dream, the Lord seemed to lay on my heart some thoughts about dreams that could apply to all of our lives today.

When our children are young and we begin our homeschool journey, we have so many dreams.  Dreams about what homeschooling will be like; dreams about what kind of mothers we will be.  Dreams about the memories we want to give our children, and dreams about what our children will be like when they grow up. Many times our dreams are unrealistic—pie in the sky daydreams that could never be.

At first, everyone tells us to relax about our dreams, and rightly so; after all, we have twelve whole years to bring our dreams to fruition—and twelve years seem like an eternity at first. But as the years slip by, we quickly fall into a routine– each year bringing its own share of joys, sorrows and challenges. Many dreams are forgotten or set aside, as we struggle daily to “get it all done”. But this year is different for me. This year I have a senior.

Having a senior has changed my perspective on everything. The senior year is a time of endings and beginnings-looking back and looking ahead. And looking back has given me some insights about what I want for our youngest two, now ages 6 and 3.

First of all, I’ve decided that I’m going to write down my dreams for my children-the realistic ones, anyway. I’m going to write down short and long range goals, and re-read them frequently to make sure I’m sticking with the plan.

After I write down those goals, I’m going to make sure to “make the main thing the main thing”.  If our main goal is really homeschooling with eternity in mind, then we will be sure to put character training and spiritual matters first.  I won’t let my own insecurities about grade levels or “getting it done” keep me from seeking the Lord first! I’m going to trust that He will add “all those other things” that I tend to stress about–and in His own time.  I’m going to trust Him to give me the wisdom, patience and confidence to back off when I need to, as well as to know when to dig in my heels. I’m praying for that ever-elusive “balance” in all things.

Lastly, I’ve decided that I’m going to worry less and enjoy more.  I want to make sure to do all the fun stuff I plan to do, and yet so often don’t accomplish. This holiday season especially, we are going to take the time to be relaxed, read daily Advent devotions, bake multiple batches of cookies, get messy with glitter, cut and paste those Christmas trees and stars, read those books (over and over, probably), play those games and generally just enjoy each other and the season.

I’ve discovered just how quickly the years fly by. Looking back, I can’t say I have any regrets about which math curriculum we chose, or how many phonics pages we finished daily.  I do have regrets though, about pushing too hard on the academics during the early years—often at the expense of those fun things that act not only as learning experiences, but also as relationship builders. It’s the music, art, reading and singing together that make our holidays special-and not just our holidays, but our “every-days” as well.  And yet these are the things we often consider to be “extra” or “unnecessary”, especially when compared to getting our academics done.  That’s sad.

Let’s take the time to do those “extras”.  Let’s make them happen for our children this year. Those “extras” make the memories we will most cherish in the future.  Those “extras” are the stuff that dreams are made of.  And only we can make those dreams come true for our children-not only at Christmas time, but every day.

  Special Books to Share With Your Children This Christmas (in no particular order):

“Arch” Christmas books (available at Bible bookstores)

The Legend of the Candy Cane (Walburg)

An Orange for Frankie (Polacco)

The Polar Express (Allsburg)

Apple Tree Christmas (Noble)

The Twelve Days of Christmas (Haidle)

Why Christmas Trees Aren’t Perfect (Schneider)

Mr. Willowby’s Christmas Tree (Barry)

A Letter to Santa Claus (Weninger/Moller)

The Light of Christmas (Evans)

Deck the Stable (Eastwick)

An Early American Christmas (dePaola)

The Tale of the Three Trees (Hunt)

Yes, Virginia, There is a Santa Claus (Church)

© 2007, 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved.  Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author.

Links and Ideas for Thanksgiving

Here are some of my favorite ideas for Thanksgiving:

-The five kernels of corn tradition

-Memorize Psalm 100:4 (or all of Psalm 100), Psalm 118:1, or 1 Thessalonians 5:18

-Make “thankfulness” the  theme of the month. Make a “thankfulness” jar or wall display (tree with leaves, clothespin wreath,  paper wreath, etc.)

-Decorate: Let the kids help you decorate the table, make place cards, etc. Options: Go on a nature walk and gather pretty leaves, acorns, seed pods, etc and combine with pumpkins, persimmons, gourds or fresh fruit and candles’; OR decorate your Thanksgiving table with your kid’s crafts: Handprint turkeys, Paperbag turkeys, Pilgrim Hats, toilet paper tube indians/pilgrims (picture here; directions here),  MORE craft ideas .

-Paint place mats, name cards etc with fall colors OR print with leaves, roll a small corn cob in fabric paint then roll on napkins,OR collage popcorn kernels, dried, split green peas, etc on namecards as a border, or the names themselves.

-Purchase a plain, white, cotton tablecloth and fabric pens. Each year, have guests write what they are thankful for on the tablecloth, then date and sign their names. This tablecloth will become more special over the years (be sure pens don’t bleed through to the table; if necessary, put butcher paper or cardboard underneath.)

-Give time (service) or give financially to the homeless shelter, Love Inc., etc. Many groups/churches gather food baskets for the poor this time of year, as well.

Singing: (Hymns): Doxology, Showers of Blessings, Count Your Blessings; (Choruses): God is so Good, -Praise Him, Praise Him ( praise him, praise Him in the morning, praise Him at the noontime…),  Allelu, Allelu, Allelu, alleluia (praise ye the Lord), Turkey Dinner Song 

Finger Plays:  5 Little Pilgrims, 5 Little Turkeys,  lots more HERE.

 Favorite Thanksgiving Books:

Squanto and the Miracle of Thanksgiving, by Eric Metaxas

Three Young Pilgrims, by Cheryl Harness

The Thanksgiving Story, by Alice Dalgliesh

He Remembered to Say Thank-You, by Mann (an Arch Bible story book)

Sometimes it’s Turkey, Sometimes it’s Feathers, by Lorna Balian

Favorite board books include Let’s Celebrate God’s Blessings on Thanksgiving, by Caldwell The Story of Thanksgiving, by Skarmeas, and I’m Thankful Each Day, by Hallinan (the version from Candy Cane Press).

© 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved.  Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author. 

Finger Play Friday

NOTE: This finger-play is written out as I learned it.  I do not know its original source. Most finger-plays, like “mother goose” rhymes, have been passed down from mother-to-daughter or from teacher-to-teacher, with slight variations.  When finger-plays are included in books, the author is usually listed as “unknown” or “traditional.” If anyone knows the original source of this finger-play, please let me know so
that I can give credit where credit is due.

This finger play is great to use in fall–for Johnny Appleseed Day, things harvested in fall, etc.

Ten Red Apples

10 red apples grow on a tree (put both hands up and out to make a tree)

5 for you (hold out one hand, indicating “5”)  and 5 for me (repeat, with other hand)

Let us shake that tree just so (hold out hands and pretend to shake tree)

And 10 red apples fall down below (make 10 fingers fall down.)

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 (count each finger).

Finger Play Friday

 This is one of the finger plays you might learn if you attend Gymboree with your children. You can also  hear it on Parachute Express’s CD, “Shakin’ It”.

Great Big Cat

There was a great BIG cat (hold hands out wide)

And a WEE little mouse (say “wee” in a high-pitched voice; hold pointer fingers close together to show how small the mouse was.)

Who ran around, and around (twirl hands around quickly)

In a high, high house (hold finger-tips together over head to make the roof-line of a house.)

Now, that WEE little mouse (say “wee” in a high-pitched voice; hold pointer fingers close together to show how small the mouse was.)

Got caught (begin to pretend to “catch” mouse by moving arms/hands together to scoop up mouse; clap hands together right after the word “last”) at last—

Because the great BIG cat (hold hands out wide, emphasis on the word “big”)

Ran around (dramatic pause here-begin to twirl hands around)  and  around (dramatuc pause here; twirl hands faster)  sooo fast.  (hold out the word “sooo”, emphasize the word “fast”, saying it quickly, while twirling hands around quickly.)

Finger Play Friday

NOTE: This finger-play is written out as I learned it. I do not know its original source. Most finger-plays, like “mother goose” rhymes, have been passed down from mother-to-daughter or from teacher-to-teacher, with slight variations. When finger-plays are included in books, the author is usually listed as “unknown” or “traditional.” If anyone knows the original source of this finger-play, please let me know so that I can give credit where credit is due.

Ten Red Apples

10 red apples grow on a tree (put both hands up and out to make a tree)

5 for you and 5 for me (hold out the five fingers of each hand one at a time.)

Let us shake that tree just so (hold out hands and shake them)

And 10 red apples fall down below (make fingers fall down.)

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 (count each finger).

Naughty Hands

(This one is definitely politically incorrect, but I love it and think it is very appropriate!)

Sometimes my hands are naughty (hold our hands, then slap one with the other)

And so my mother says, that she will have to scold them (shake finger as if scolding)

And send them off to bed (fold hands in prayer stance, then place on side of head; lay head on fingers, turn head to one side as if resting on a pillow, shut eyes and pretend to go to sleep.)

So little hands, be careful, of everything you do (hold out hands and look at them–OR extend pointer finger and shake it)

Because if you are sent to bed, I must go there too! (point to self; then fold hands in prayer stance and place on side of head; lay head on hand, turn head to one side as if resting on a pillow, shut eyes and pretend to go to sleep.)

Backyard Nature Study: A Surprise Visitor

We had a visitor in our backyard this week—one that really surprised us. Here’s what
happened:

The dogs were barking like crazy. They seemed to be barking at something on the ground. In the past, they’ve killed mice (our doxies are great mousers), toads (I can’t tell you how many toads I’ve saved from the “jaws of death”—I’ve decided to count  next spring/summer), baby birds, and kittens (they dug under the fence and dragged them out of a neighbor’s yard—so sad–but they survived, thank goodness.) Anyway, the dogs were intently staring at something
on the ground, and barking like maniacs. I sent Ben outside to see what they were upset about, but I quickly followed him outside when I heard the dogs starting to fight over it. Was it another mouse, or some other creature I needed to save? I could see something in the grass, oblong shaped, but I wasn’t quite close enough to see what it was (or didn’t believe my eyes) until Ben shouted, “It’s a turtle!”

Sure enough, it was a turtle, flipped onto its back. I quickly snatched it out of the dog’s reach and brought it to safety inside.

The turtle was completely pulled into his shell.  There were not even any visible openings for its head, arms, or legs. We put it in a plastic container with some lettuce and a lid filled with water, and waited to see what would happen. We weren’t even sure if it was alive.

But after only a few minutes, a little head poked out! While the boys watched it, I got on the internet to see if I could identify it. I had noticed that the bottom of its shell seemed to be cracked in a straight line across the upper third of its body, and there was a tiny bit of blood in spots. That “crack” turned out to be a hinge—and we quickly identified it as a box turtle.

I found out that the box turtle’s hinge allows it to completely hide inside its shell. (There aren’t any visible holes in the shell at all when it’s pulled inside!) It can open and close its hinge  like a little door. Also, while inside their shells, box turtles can move their hinge and “rock” themselves from front to back. There is a band of skin around their necks—almost like a tight, thick choker necklace—that their head retracts into. Josh said it looked like
leather. This little guy had three back toes and four front toes, both with impressive little claws, and it had orange spots on its body. Whenever it was startled, it hissed. We were fascinated!

The boys begged to keep the turtle, but I knew that its presence, even in a habitat in the front yard, would drive our dogs nuts. I also knew my dear husband had no interest in trying to build
us a safe place to keep him/her…so I decided  to find our visitor a new home, and it’s a good thing I did.

A friend knew a friend who kept turtles, and she agreed to take it…until she saw it, that is. She could tell that it was a female, and she could tell right away that it was hurt and might
be sick. She didn’t want to risk exposing her healthy turtles to a sick one. So I drove it out to California Living Museum, having been assured by another friend that they would take her. However, they take only indigenous animals, so they didn’t want her, either! Even so, it wasn’t a wasted trip, because they gave me the name of someone from our local “Turtle and Tortoise Club”, saying they did “recues.”  What a relief.

That very night we bid good-bye to our visitor and drove her to the man from the Turtle Club. He immediately recognized that her shell had been chewed, right near her head (I don’t know why I didn’t realize it—it was obvious.) Also, her hinge had small specks of blood on it, still. Additionally, by then, we had realized that she wasn’t eating. He assured me that she would be seen by a vet right away, be nursed back to health, and then placed in a good home.

So ends our turtle adventure–except…naturally, like any typical homeschooling family, we had to learn more about turtles!

Box Turtle facts we learned (besides what I shared above):

-Box turtles are land-dwellers.

-Our little turtle was no more than 5 or 6 inches long, but she was surprisingly heavy.

-Box turtles eat grass, lettuce and so on (as I expected), but I was surprised to find out that they are omnivores–enjoying snails, worms, and other insects as well (they eat the snails shell and all.) According to  Box Turtle Care A to Z,  “Wild turtles are omnivores and in will eat earthworms, snails, grubs, beetles, caterpillars, carrion, grasses, fallen fruit, berries, mushrooms and flowers. They will take a bite of anything that smells edible.”  Apparently they love corn on the cob.

-Their backbones and ribs are fused to their shell. Since they have backbones, they are vertebrates.

-Turtles hibernate. Our friend told us that their pet turtles stop eating before hibernation (that’s not why ours had stopped eating–it is still warm here, and too soon for hibernation). When it’s time for them to hibernate, some people put their turtles in the vegetable drawer of their refrigerators for the winter; others put them in boxes (with newspaper padding) and then put them on a shelf in the garage until spring.

-Box turtles cannot right themselves if they are flipped on their backs. If we hadn’t found her, she would have died.

-Box turtles are NOT slow. They are quick little characters, and can even CLIMB.

-Box turtles can live as long as fifty years.

This was a unique opportunity for us to see a turtle close up–it really was amazing. I’m sorry the dogs chewed on her…I’m sorry we couldn’t keep her…but I’m glad we got to study
her for a couple of days, and glad to know she’ll get a good home.

Turtle books we’re going to read for continued research (This is one of those “teachable” moments that we’ll turn into a mini unit study):

Box Turtle at Long Pond, by William T. George

Take Along Guides: Frogs, Toads, and Turtles, by Diane L. Burns

A Turtle in the House, John Gabriel Navarra

Album of Reptiles, by Tom McGowen

(We’ll see if we get off on a tangent of reptiles, in general.)

Books for the boys to read:

Let’s Get Turtles (A Science I Can Read Book), by Millicent E. Selsam (a longer one)

Reptiles do the Strangest Things, by Leonora and Arthur Hornblow

© 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved.  Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author. 

Christian Children and Halloween: Should They Mix?

Halloween is usually associated with “innocent fun.” I celebrated Halloween as a kid…who didn’t?  We went around the neighborhood with a mixture of excitement and fear.  My dad and brothers were really into it.  One year, my dad rigged up a crane of sorts that could be controlled from the inside of the house.  When children approached the door, they used it to drop down a scary looking dummy right in front of them.  Another year, our church (yes, our church) put on an adult Halloween party.  My brothers helped decorate a barn for the occasion.  They somehow got a coffin in the center of the barn with a scary looking dummy inside.  They rigged it up so that the coffin opened and closed, and if you touched it, you got a mild electric shock.

Innocent fun, right?  Anything but.  If you are brave and willing to have your way of thinking challenged, read on…

Now that I’m an adult, I hate Halloween.  We don’t celebrate it, my children don’t dress up, and they don’t “trick or treat.”  We don’t even answer the door.  I refuse to celebrate a “holiday” that glorifies witches, demons, Satan, and evil.

Many parents tell their children that these things are just “pretend.”  Really?  I don’t know about you, but I can’t tell my children that witches and demons aren’t real.  And ghosts?  I believe that what most people think of as “ghosts” are really demons.

I wonder about the spiritual repercussions of Halloween as well…especially in regards to preschool-aged children.  I don’t know about you, but I don’t want our young, impressionable children thinking about monsters, witches, and demons.  I hope you understand how terrifying they are to preschoolers…especially since we honestly can’t tell them that they are pretend.  What might that lead to? Bad thoughts?  (Certainly.)  Lack of faith in the protection and power of God?  Bad dreams?  Spiritual oppression?  Interest in the occult?! Maybe.  Can we risk that?!

Other things I hate about Halloween:  I hate that I can’t even go out to eat or to the grocery store without exposing my children to scary things that glorify the devil.  In fact, I avoid taking the kids shopping or even out to dinner this time of year.

I hate the feeling of spiritual oppression that comes over me this time of year.

I hate that Halloween is imposed on me (I don’t knock on my neighbor’s doors on Christmas and demand a present upon risk of playing a trick on them.)   I also hate what Halloween teaches children:  That it’s OK to knock on the doors of strangers and take candy from them; that scary, evil things are real, acceptable, and fun.  But most of all, I hate Halloween’s roots and what it represents spiritually.

In my opinion, Halloween is not a Christian holiday and should not be celebrated by Christians.  I believe that as Christians, we should teach our children that evil is evil, and it is to be avoided.  Not only are we to avoid evil, but even the appearance of evil.  Part of our responsibility as parents is protecting our children’s innocence and their thoughts, as well as teaching them to control and protect their own thoughts as well.

Below are some links that better explain what the Bible has to say about such things, how the “holiday” got started, and what Halloween really celebrates.  The last two links will take you to You Tube videos, where a former witch shares why Halloween is not for Christians.  I hope you will prayerfully consider the information, and pray about your family’s decision to celebrate Halloween—or not.

Should Christian’s Celebrate Halloween?

The Truth About Halloween (article)

The Truth about Halloween—video by a former witch, part 1

Part 2 

Can You Christianize Halloween?

Prayerfully,

~Susan

© 2010, 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved.  Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author.

Why Preschoolers Need to Play

“Through our years of research, we have come to the conclusion that play is to early childhood what gas is to a car.  It is the very fuel of every intellectual activity that our children engage in.  Researchers are in universal agreement that play provides a strong foundation for intellectual growth, creativity, and problem solving.  And it also serves as a vehicle for emotional development, and for the development of essential social skills.  In the 21rst century, creative problem solvers, independent thinkers, and people with expert social acumen will inevitable surpass those who have learned to be efficient at getting the right answers.”  -Kathy Hirsh-Pasek, P.H.D., and Roberta Michnichnick Golinkoff, P.H.D., Einstein Never Used Flash Cards

The value of play is greatly underestimated in our society today.  Not so long ago, young children spent most of their time in creative, unstructured play.  But nowadays, more and more of our children’s time is taken up with “educational” activities, parent-initiated activities, television and computer time.  Dr. Alvin Rosenfield, a noted child psychiatrist, recently quoted these startling new statistics:  “In the past twenty years, structured sports time has doubled, unstructured children’s activities have declined by 50%, household conversations have become far less frequent, family dinners have declined by 33%, and family vacations have decreased by 28%”*.

Even families with preschoolers are often so busy driving their children from one adult initiated activity to another that little time remains for family time and playtime. Many families seem to think that these “enriching activities” keep children busy, happy, and learning.  But the reality is, this “busyness” is stopping us from giving our children what they need most:  Time to develop close bonds with family members, and time to play.

Experts agree (how often does that happen?) that play is key to normal child development.  Through play, children learn.  Check out these important links to learn more about the importance of play– in our homes and our homeschools.

Can We Play? By David Elkind

Old Fashioned Play Builds Serious Skills, by Alix Spegel

The Academic-Versus-Play Debate, by Rae Pica

The Prop Box: Setting the Staqge for Meaningful Play

An Excerpt from A Child’s Work: The Importance of Fanasy Play, by Vivian Gussin Paley

The Vital Role of Play in Childhood, by Joan Almon

(NOTE: I haven’t investigated the other articles on these sites, and so can only recommend the pages above, not other pages on these links or their recommended links.)

Important Tips:

~Never allow yourself to think, “She’s just playing.”

~Provide open-ended toys and props that your children can use in many different ways.

~Play with your children, but don’t assume a leadership role in their play.  Instead, follow your child’s lead.

~Limit television and computer time.  Let your children come up with their own imaginary scenarios–or let them get inspiration from books.

~Observe your children’s play:  That’s what child development experts do!  Watching your children’s play clues you in on their secret world.

~Children will play longer and play safely if you stay nearby to watch and give occasional feedback.

Give your children plenty of time for unstructured. uninterrupted, creative play.  They need it more than you can ever imagine.

Note:  Homepreschool and Beyond has a whole chapter on play, how to play with your children, how to choose good toys, and more.

This post contains excerpts from the book, “Homepreschool and Beyond”; used with permission.  © 2010, 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved.

Training Your Children for Christ: Steps to Effective Parenting

 Excerpts from “Love, Marriage, and Home”, by William Booth (founder of the Salvation 

      ”There are certain things that parents must do indeed, that only parents can do if their children are to become true servants of God. I don’t want to hide the fact that what I’m setting before you will not be gained without considerable difficulty, carefulness and work. However, nothing truly good or great is ever accomplished without trouble. I am certain that for every intense hour and patient effort this work demands, parents will be abundantly repaid if they succeed.

Things Parents Should Do

     First, there are some things that must be done if you want to reach the great goal in the training of children-for them to love and serve God with a pure heart. You must keep you goal constantly before your mind. Look it in the fact and determine to accomplish it. Don’t let the seductive charms of the world or the temptations of the devil or the promptings of ease and pleasure turn you aside. Ah, Fathers and Mothers, you must make up your minds to do it or die.

Be a holy example. Create and confirm in the hearts of your children the assurance that you yourself are what you want them to become. Practice the same unselfish love and righteousness you ask of them.  Without this, you will never accomplish the goals you have set your heart on.

Teach your children what real Christianity is. Make them understand it. Make them admire it. Explain it as soon as they can take it in. Base your teaching on the principles and examples of the Bible, especially in the life and death of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the examples of His disciples, but don’t limit it to them.

You must make following Christ a part of your everyday life. Your children must feel that you are as religious at home as in the meetings, on Mondays and on Sundays, in your work as on your knees. Without always talking to them about it, your faith in God should be the atmosphere of the house, so in that atmosphere they can “live and move and have their being (Acts 17:28).”

All I can say is…wow. Convicting, isn’t it? This is the cry of my heart right now. Is it yours?

Click HERE to read Booth’s complete book on family life (note:  I have not read the other pages linked to this site, and cannot vouch for their content.)  I’m sure a little browsing online will produce more.
of Booth’s works, since they are now in public domain; not easy reading, but definitely worth the time.

I suppose if I analyize it carefully, I would have to qualify this quote with a few of my own points:

-First of all, I believe that we can’t “make” our children understand Christianity; that is the role of the Holy Spirit. But we can and should teach them about it, and do our best to live it out before them day by day.

-Because of free will, I spend alot of time talking to my boys about their choices (along with their consequences)–especially the consequences of sin (sin hurts our relationship with God; sin always hurts us; sin always hurts others. When we step out from under the protective umbrella of God’s will, we are unprotected and there will be consequences.) I also teach them how to repent–it’s more than saying “I’m sorry.” There are three steps: 1) ask God for forgiveness, 2) ask anyone we offended for forgiveness by saying, “I’m sorry I (be specific about what you did), it was (wrong, hurtful, etc), will you forgive me?”, and 3) then turn away from our sin (which often means doing the opposite.)

-I also believe that praying for our children and blessing them is vitally important to sucessful parenting. Pray with your spouse, and if you can, find a prayer partner: A close friend who will pray with you and for you and your family regularly.

~Susan

Finger Play Friday

NOTE: This finger-play is written out as I learned it.  I do not know its original source. Most finger-plays, like “mother goose” rhymes, have been passed down from mother-to-daughter or from teacher-to-teacher, with slight variations.  When finger-plays are included in books, the author is usually listed as “unknown” or “traditional.” If anyone knows the original source of this finger-play, please let me know so that I can give credit where credit is due.

Galloping Horses

10 horses galloped into town (start by holding your hands behind your back, then bring hands around to the front and “gallop” your fingers in front of you.)

5 where black (hold out right hand in front of you, as if you were motioning to stop)

And 5 where brown (repeat action with other hand.)

They galloped up (make hands “gallop” up)

They galloped down (make hands “gallop” down)

Then they galloped and they galloped right out of town! (“gallop” hands off to one hand.)

Finger Play Friday

NOTE: This finger-play is written out as I learned it.  I do not know its original source. Most finger-plays, like “mother goose” rhymes, have been passed down from mother-to-daughter or from teacher-to-teacher, with slight variations.  When finger-plays are included in books, the author is usually listed as “unknown” or “traditional.” If anyone knows the original source of this finger-play, please let me know so that I can give credit where credit is due.

5 Little Monkeys

5 little monkeys, swinging in a tree,

(hold up one hand for “5”, then hang hand down and “swing” it back and forth like a monkey hanging from a tree by it’s tail.)

Teasing Mr. Alligator “you can’t catch me—you can’t catch ME!”

 (put thumbs behind ears and mock the alligator by moving fingers back and forth)

Along came Mr. Alligator quick as can be,

(make an alligator by placing hands in the “prayer” position and then hold them straight out in front of body to make an alligator’s head; wiggle from side to side, so the alligator “swims”.)

And he snatched that monkey right out of the tree!

(use hands, still in “alligator” stance, to open and close with a clap right on the word “snatched”.)

Repeat, changing the number: 4 little monkeys swinging in a tree, and so on, counting down to zero. When you get to zero, you say:

Now there’s no more monkeys swinging in the tree

(old up fist to indicate “zero”, while shaking head, “no”.)

But here comes Mr. Alligator (put palms together to make alligator; make alligator “swim”)

As fat as he can be. (On the word, “fat”, hold arms out to sides to show a “fat” alligator body; rock arms and body from side to side, as if waddling.)

Making Storytime Special

 (Classic repost, updated.)     

       Many years ago I had an experience I’ll never forget.  While visiting a friend’s house–a mother of preschoolers–I observed the following: Her little one brought her a book, and trundled onto her lap so that she could be read to. My friend pulled her up onto her lap, and started reading to her…but this was no ordinary story. It was the fastest story I’ve ever heard! There was no expression, nor any discussion of the book or its pictures. She read it as quickly as she could, just to get it over with. 

       I hope this wasn’t the usual way stories went at her house. I understand that she did have company, and she wanted to placate her child so that we could continue our visit. But the whole thing made me sad. It’s something I’ve never forgotten.

       Reading aloud should be a special time of bonding between parent and child. It should never be viewed only as an obligation—something to be rushed through at break-neck speed. Story time should be enjoyed…relished. 

       There are so many ways to make story time special. They are all simple, and so much fun!  Here are a few ideas:

 -Take your time and enjoy the story. Read a little more slowly than you think you need to. Enunciate your words clearly; your children copy your speech.

-Read with expression, and get into character: whisper, shout, growl, squeal, and make animal sounds as appropriate. Make male voices sound low, and female voices higher. Make each character as unique as you can–my boys love it when I add a southern accent for Hank the Cowdog.

-Encourage your children to chime in when there is a familiar or repetitive phrases.

-Pause at the end of phrases, to see if your child can fill in any missing words.   

-Try reading in new places:  How about a picnic read aloud time?  You can have a picnic indoors or out.  Maybe your little girls would enjoy a “tea time” reading. Read in different rooms, in your bed, in front of the fireplace, during bathtime, and so on. We love to read while snuggling on the couch, under a fluffy blanket.

-Try including pets or ”loveys” (favorite blankets or stuffed animals) in your reading time.

-Extend your read-aloud time by acting out nursery rhymes and favorite stories, and watch your children’s play for signs that your read-aloud time is sinking-in: You’ll know you’ve found a gem of a book when your children include the book in their pretend-play spontaneously.

-Talk about the story:  Speculate: What might happen next? What could the character have done differently? Notice the details in the pictures, as they relate to the story. Ask your child to describe the characters:  What kind of dog is Harry? (A black dog with white spots.)  What is the one thing he doesn’t like?  (He doesn’t like taking a bath. These details are from one of our favorite books,  Harry the Dirty Dog, by Gene Zion.)

-Notice details in each book’s art: How are the pictures made? Are they drawn, painted, colored, or collaged (what is the medium used?) Notice the artist’s use of color and light as well.

-Have your child tell the story, or part of it, back to you (narration.) 

-Give your child a “print-rich” environment.  Keep books at your child’s eye-level, to encourage them to investigate books themselves—or pick out books that they would like to hear. We used plastic rain gutters to make bookshelves right by our boy’s beds and provided them with reading lamps to encourage them to read in bed.

-Choose books that are about topics that are of special interest to your children. Consider turning books/storytime into a daily or weekly unit study or “theme” by reading about one main topic at a time, and by adding fun activities/art projects/dramatic play, etc that enhances the reading experience.

-Communicate to your children that books are important to you.  Let your children see you reading books. Share books that you loved as a child with your children.

-Buy books as presents; give books as rewards (books are only rewards if they are GOOD books. Check out my archives for “book lists” and my post on  “Choosing and Finding Classic Picture Books”.)

-(For older children): Read a book, and then watch a movie based on the book.  How are they different? Which is better? Why?   

-Something we do: Quote special sentences/passages from favorite books (and movies) when appropriate. Ask your children if they remember which books the sayings are from, which character said it, how he said it, and so on.

      Don’t just read to your children—make reading special!

© 2010/2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved. 

Off to a Rough Start? Advice for Parents of Young Learners (pre-K-grade 3)

   Note:  This is a classic re-post that orginally appeared on my Home School Enrichment blog several years back.  Thanks HSE, for giving permission for me to re-post it!

  
     Have you been thinking: “Here it is, only October, and I already feel like a failure as a homeschooling Mom?” I feel a little like that right now, too.

      It seems as though September was nothing but one interruption after another.  We had one child struggling with an ongoing illness, along with all the requisite doctor appointments; we had unwelcome guests in our house—two mice—which meant traps, then cleaning and sterilizing; we ALL got miserable colds, and finally, we finished off the month with our annual off-season vacation.

     Not enough school has been completed!  I already feel “behind”.  My plans have been set aside, and my vision for the first month of the school did NOT come true. 

     What should you do if your year has started like ours? First of all, and especially if you are new to homeschooling: Realize that “some days are like that.” Actually, some months are like that. I always tell new homeschoolers that the hardest part of homeschooling is not the academics—it’s life. It’s dealing with interruptions, illness, errands and laundry. This is a normal part of homeschooling that we all must learn to deal with.   

     Another important thing to remember is that there is nothing as hard to deal with as unrealized expectations.  They can be heartbreaking. Many homeschoolers, especially new ones, envision the “perfect homeschool”: Cheerful, obedient children who love to learn; a patient, totally organized Mom whose lessons plans are legendary and always completed. It’s hard when our dreams don’t match up with reality.
 
     So what should you do if your year is off to a rough start?  Here are some ideas:

-Pray and ask the Lord to renew your enthusiasm about homeschooling. Ask the Lord to give you HIS vision for your homeschool.

-Take an eternal perspective: Remember that this time at home with your children is just a “blink” compared to eternity. We want our children taught in the way that most benefits their eternity—and that is homeschooling. 

-Feel behind? Ask yourself, “Behind WHO?” Remember that the public schools expect too much of young children, and not enough of older children. The goal should be steady progress (slow and steady wins the race.) Preschoolers and Kindergarteners need time to build a foundation of basic knowledge about the world, and a wide vocabulary before they are introduced to formal academics.

-Re-examine your expectations. Are they appropriate? Often new homeschoolers spend TOO much time daily, and expect TOO much from their children—especially YOUNG children. 

-Re-examine the readiness issue: Has what you’ve been expecting of your young learner been inappropriate?  Is your child resistant? If so, perhaps you need to back off a little.  

-Re-examine your routine. Is it appropriate? Does it include plenty of breaks, and time for younger students to play? Do your children have regular bedtimes, and a set time to wake up? Do you? Do you get up and dressed BEFORE your children do?

-Consider shortening your lessons, doing more work orally, and generally “lightening” your load. Charlotte Mason says that short lessons actually build children’s attention spans.  After all, it is better to have your child fully engaged and paying attention for a short lesson, than having him squirmy and inattentive for a long lesson. We want our children to look forward to school; we want to keep them begging for more.

 -Consider changing to a year round schedule. A year round schedule allows you to take time off when you need to. You can take time off for family emergencies, illnesses or cleaning days without worry. We take off extra time around the holidays in exchange for schooling part of the summer (when it’s too hot to do much in central California, anyway.) During the early years of schooling (K-3), we follow a four day week, and only three days include an academic emphasis; one day is used for park days, field trips, library time, art, messy projects, nature walks, games, life skills, catch up work, etc.

-Make homeschooling your priority. Schedule everything you can around it. Don’t let the phone or appointments take you away from school time, unless it is absolutely unavoidable.

-If you haven’t already, take the time to write down the reasons you decided to homeschool in the first place–as well as some basic goals. That way, when you have a tough day (or week), you can re-read them and remind yourself that those reasons haven’t changed.  You’ll probably see that your important goals are being met, as well. (These are usually spiritual or behavioral in nature.)

-Plan time for the fun stuff: I know this doesn’t make sense if you feel “behind”; our tendency is to double the school work instead.  Resist that temptation or you and your child will quickly become frustrated and burnt out.  Instead, plan the time you need to enjoy art and music with your children.  Art and music are more than just “extra” subjects; they teach skills vital for young children.  Furthermore, they lighten the mood in your home, make learning fun, and give you and your children the opportunity to feel successful.

-Start over:  If you are new to homeschooling and feel as if September has been a bust, give yourself a chance to start over.  Count the days you have done as “practice”, or time to break into your school routine, and then start over.  That’s right, start over from right where you are, only adding the necessary adjustments. 

-Finally, remember that whenever God calls us to do something, He will give us the strengths and the abilities we need to complete it.  Don’t let a rough start make you reconsider your decision to homeschool…don’t give up.  Implement some of the changes I’ve suggested, and hang in there.  It does get easier.

Live the 4R’s!

    ~Susan

© 2010 Susan Lemons all rights reserved.  Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author.

Finger-Play Friday

NOTE: This finger-play is written out as I learned it.  I do not know its original source. Most finger-plays, like “mother goose” rhymes, have been passed down from mother-to-daughter or from teacher-to-teacher, with slight variations.  When finger-plays are included in books, the author is usually listed as “unknown” or “traditional.” If anyone knows the original source of this finger-play, please let me know so that I can give credit where credit is due.

 10 Little Soldiers

 10 little soldiers, standing in a row. (Hold up ten fingers.)

When they see the captain, they bow just so. (Bend finger-tips only.)

They march to the left and march to the right (move hands to the left, then the right),

Then shut their eyes and sleep all night. (Fold hands in prayer stance, then place on side of head; lay head on hands, turn head to one side as if resting on a pillow, shut eyes and pretend to go to sleep. We usually add soft snoring sounds at this point.)

      Have fun, and remember, it is your confidence and enthusiasm that makes finger-plays “work” and come alive with fun!! ~Susan

The Best Homepreschool/Homeschool Curriculum

    What is the best homepreschool/homeschool curriculum? You might be surprised…read this re-post to find out.   

     I define curriculum as “anything used to help your children learn.”  This includes living books certainly, and for older children it includes textbooks–but it also includes relationships, park play days, games, hands-on experiences, videos, art, music, nature walks, field trips…life itself.  An often overlooked part of the definition of curriculum is:  Us.  The parents.  No matter what curriculum or method we use, we are the real teachers.  We teach; not the curriculum.  In fact, I think it would be accurate to say that we are the curriculum. 

     Whether we are consciously aware of it or not, we are teaching our children all the time.  We teach them during our “school” time as well as all day long through our actions (or inactions), our attitudes, and our behaviors.

     Are your actions, attitudes, and behaviors teaching your children lessons that you want them to learn?  What about your conversations?  Consider also the amount (or lack thereof) of love and self-control your children see in you.  Ouch.  In short…are you being the best parent you can be?

     I talk about this in Homepreschool and Beyond in the chapter, “Teaching Through Parenting.”  Here is a quote:

      “The best definition of good parenting I’ve ever heard is from Anne Ortland, who says, “Successful  parenting means: One, becoming what you should be and two, staying close enough to the children that it will rub off.” 1  She challenges us further by asking, “What will you become, in order that your offspring may turn out to be great human beings for God?” 

     Mrs. Ortland’s quotes neatly summarize what the Bible says about discipling our children. Proverbs 23:26 says, “My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.” Luke 6:40 says, “The disciple (we could insert “student,” or “child” here) is not above his master (parents); but every one that is perfect shall be as his master (parents).”

     I believe this is the greatest challenge facing Christian parents today: Becoming what we should be, and setting a proper example for our children.  It’s hard, isn’t it?  And it can be discouraging when we realize that we can’t always “blame the kids” for their misbehavior, because we might have taught them to act that way.

“Often our actions influence our children’s behavior, and then we get angry at them for acting that way!  We might become angry because our child is mirroring a bad habit of ours-and we don’t want to be reminded that we have it.  God uses children to mature us, and when they start acting like we do, we feel put down a notch.  Sometimes, we don’t even realize why we’re so upset with them, but it’s because THEY are doing what God has been telling US not to do.”  -Kathy Collard Miller, Healing the Angry Heart      (Emphasis added)

 

     When our young children are misbehaving, we should always look to ourselves first—because young children reflect all we say and do with their behaviors.  Before we can help our children change, we must change ourselves.  “Do as I say, not as I do” just doesn’t cut it.  Good parenting is just as much about controlling ourselves as it is about controlling our children, remembering that as much is “caught” as is “taught.” 

        Yes, we are teaching their children all the time– whether we intend to or not. We consciously teach them about the world, but we also unconsciously teach them with our behavior and our attitudes.  We need to be sure that the lessons we are teaching are the lessons we want our children to learn.”

“Be a holy example.  Create and confirm in the hearts of your children that you yourself are what you want them to become.  Practice the same unselfish love and righteousness that your ask of them.  Without this, you will never accomplish the goals you have set your heart on.  Don’t expect your children to be any better in conduct than the example set before them—by you, by their friends, or those they spend time with.” -William Booth, Founder of the Salvation Army, 1902

       I have to admit, it is convicting to read my own words.  There have been times lately that I have not been the best example for my children (probably a lot of times.)  I’m tired.  I’m cranky.  I’ve gotten to that point that Bill Cosby describes:  “Parents don’t care about justice; they just want peace.”   <Sigh.> But I am here and now prayerfully re-committing myself to do better.  But how? What do I need to do to change myself? 

        I think the first thing to remember is that apart from Christ, I can do nothing.  So the first thing I have to do is make sure I’m where I need to be spiritually.  Here are some specific ideas I’m going to work on:  

~I’m going to make sure that I keep myself in-tune spiritually, taking the time to do my own devotions and prayer time.  They rejuvenate me.  I need them. 

~I’m going to pray with my prayer partner more often.

~I’m going to practice the presence of God, and remind my children to do the same.

~I’m going to play praise music throughout the day.

~ I’m going to make Bible and character the true focus of our day. 

        Next, I will:

~Do some relationship building:  Take time for the fun stuff (I’ll plan for it).  I’m going to take more time to play with my kids inside and out (my boys love games).

~More relationship building: I’ll make sure I’m taking the time necessary for real, back-and-fourth conversations.

~I’m going to make sure that we stick to our daily routine as much as possible.

~If necessary, to ease some tension, I will slightly shorten our school lessons.  I want the boys to experience success, look forward to school and love to learn.

~I’m going to keep myself physically rested.

~I’m going to take time for myself as I can:  A trip to the Goodwill bookstore alone once in awhile, and a good book and a hot bath at night when I need them.

        Other ideas that you might want to try:

~Re-read the reasons you decided to homeschool (or write them out.)

~Plan a “date night” with your husband.

         What do you think?  Do you have any ideas that help you be the parent you should be?  Will you re-commit with me?!  If so, leave a comment and let me know so that we can pray for each other.

        Make the main thing the main thing!

                             ~Susan

       1 Anne Ortland, Disciplines of the Home 

       2 Raymond and Dorothy Moore, Home Grown Kids

 © 2010, 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved.  Some portions of this post were excerpted from Homepreschool and Beyond, A Comprehensive Guide to Early Home Education; used with permission.  Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author.

Finger-Play Friday

     O.K., O.K., I know it’s not Friday yet. But I wanted to get a head start, and have these in my subscriber’s in-boxes first thing in the morning. I hope to make “Finger-Play Fridays” a permament fixture around here for awhile–at least until I run out of finger-plays!  Let me know what you think.  ~Susan

 NOTE: This finger-play is written out as I learned it.  I do not know its original source. Most finger-plays, like “mother goose” rhymes, have been passed down from mother-to-daughter or from teacher-to-teacher, with slight variations.  When finger-plays are included in books, the author is usually listed as “unknown” or “traditional.” If anyone knows the original source of this finger-play, please let me know so that I can give credit where credit is due.

 10 Little Fingers

 I have ten little fingers, and they all belong to me. (Hold up ten fingers)

I can make them do things—would you like to see? (Continue to hold up ten fingers)

I can shut them up tight (close fists)

I can open them wide (open fingers wide.)

I can put them together (put hands together)

Or I can make them hide (quickly hide hands behind back.)

I can jump them up high (“jump” hands up)

Or jump them down low (“jump” hands low.)

And I can fold them quietly, just like so.

(Fold hands together, interlacing fingers. On the words, “just like so”, move folded hands slightly up and down for emphasis; say the words, “just like so” with staccato emphasis.)

 

Making the Decision to Homeschool: Questions to Ask Yourself if You Are Considering Homeschooling (part 5)

My Answers to questions 7 and 8:

7.  What would the perfect school be like?  We all know there is no such thing as a “perfect” school, anymore than there is a “perfect” person or a “perfect” family.  But, if you could find a school that is as close to perfect as possible, what would it be like?

Imagine you could find a school where the teacher knows and loves your children, and could individualize the curriculum to fit each child’s learning style and your family’s’ own beliefs. Imagine a school where your child is treated as an individual and not simply as part of a group—a school where your child receives ample individualized attention every day, and yet provides a positive and enriching social environment that promotes family unity, love and togetherness.  Imagine being able to avoid negative influences and peer pressure. Imagine a school where every special physical, spiritual, emotional or academic need is addressed with care.  Imagine that this school teaches every subject from a Christian perspective, and achieves academic excellence.  Imagine this school encouraging curiosity, the love of learning and independent thinking while avoiding the negative influences of false teachings and peer pressure.  Imagine a school where your child has both time and opportunity to explore his/her special interests and abilitiies.   Does this sound too good to be true?   Does this sound like an  impossible dream?  Such schools do exist—in the form of millions of  parent-led homeschools all over this country and the world.

8. Why homeschool?   Every homeschooling family has their own reasons–often many of them.  Here are a few of my favorite reasons:

1. We choose to homeschool because we feel that homeschooling is God’s will for our family. We believe the scriptures make it clear that parents are responsible for training and educating their own children.  We have decided to put our children’s spiritual life and development above all else.  We homeschool because we want our children to grow up to be Christians.

2.  We choose to homeschool so that we can pass on our worldview-our beliefs about religion, morality and politics-to our children.  We want our family’s culture to be our culture.

3. We homeschool so we can individualize our children’s learning, moving them ahead in the areas where they are advanced, and slowing the pace where they are struggling.  We can adjust our curriculum and methods to fit each child’s learning style (I don’t believe in mass-produced, one-size-fits-all learning!)

4. So that our children can experience positive socialization.  We have the ability to develop deep, long lasting friendships while avoiding negative influences and peer pressure.

5.  Homeschooling promotes family unity and sibling bonding.  Besides, we like our children, enjoy their company, and want them to be with us.

6. Homeschooling allows us to have a flexible schedule, taking days off when dad is off, vacationing off-season, etc.  We can school year round or on a traditional schedule, if we wish, and we can set our own hours.

7. We can go to school in our pajamas (OR in the backyard, OR in front of the fireplace, OR at the Zoo…)

8. Government schools are not physically safe for our children.  There are no bomb-scares, gang-fights or lockdowns at home.  Additionally, our children are exposed to less illness and disease.

9. Homeschooling allows us to protect our children’s innocence, and provide them with an old-fashioned, less pressured childhood.

10. Homeschoolers don’t have homework! (Usually).  After school time is your own.  Children have more time to pursue their own hobbies and interests, and those interests sometimes lead to future career paths.  Children have time to read, play, and just BE.

11. Lack of generation gap:  Don’t listen to the “just waits”.   You know, those parents who say to you, “Well, you might be enjoying your 6, 7, or 8 year old, but “just wait” until they are 12, 13, or 14!”  Just wait until they are teenagers.  You know they’ll rebel; it’s only normal.”   No, NO, NOOO!!  It isn’t normal; you don’t have to expect it, and they don’t have to rebel (or be disrespectful, having sex, drinking, etc!)    When you homeschool, your culture is your children’s culture—not the rebellious teen counterculture–, and when your children grow up they will maintain steadfast in your family’s own beliefs, values and culture.

The teen years are fun to homeschool, because you are reaping the benefits of all your previous training.  You can still enjoy their company–they aren’t ashamed to be seen with you–and you can still have fun and enjoy each other’s company just like before.  School gets easier as they can work more on their own, and the discussions that you can have about God and life and history and worldviews are PRICELESS.

12.  We homeschool to develop lifelong learners who use their abilities to the fullest.  No education, no matter how thorough and complete, can cover every subject thoroughly.  There is just too much to learn nowadays!   All of us have “gaps”—areas of education that where missed or where our retention was not optimal.  Therefore, we desire that our children be ready and able to fill those gaps for themselves, even as adults.  We want our children to love to learn, know how to think logically, and know how to do research.  That way, when a gap in their education is discovered, even as adults, they will have both the desire and the skills necessary to fill it.

13. We want the opportunity to give our children every academic advantage possible.  The tutorial method of learning just can’t be beat (one-on-one).  Additionally, we want to follow a natural, logical sequence of learning—a developmentally appropriate one that can expect less from Kindergarteners, but much more from junior and high-school aged children.  Slow and steady wins the race.

Conclusion 

Dear parents, don’t be afraid to take that leap of faith and begin homeschooling.  If you feel that God is calling your family to home-education, you can be sure that He will give you the wisdom, patience and abilities you will need to successfully complete the task.  He will provide all you need and more.

Don’t worry about what your extended family, friends or neighbors might think; only worry about your responsibility to your children’s education and most importantly, their eternity.

Next post: Are you worried about what your children are missing (if you homeschool?)

© 2010, 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved. Portions of this post are exerpted from Homepreschool and Beyond and are used with permission. Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author.

Making the Decision to Homeschool: Questions To Ask Yourself if You Are Considering Homeschooling (part 4)

     My answers to questions 4, 5, and 6:

4.  What is the purpose of education? Is it just to grow up and get a good job, or are there other considerations?  (Religious? Moral Social? Others?)

 To the government, the purpose of education is to “turn out” a certain type of citizen.  To many parents, the purpose of education is so that their child can get into a good college, and then get a good job.  I disagree with both of these ideas.  I believe the purpose of education is to:

*To help children know, love, and obey God

*To train children in spiritual matters, morals, and character traits; to develop good habits.

*To prepare children to serve God, no matter what He calls them to d0.

*To give children a solid, well-rounded base of knowledge about the world, and to prepare them to be good and responsible citizens.

*To help our children become excellent readers, since reading crucial to all other learning and all other subjects

*To provide real life, practical learning experiences whenever possible (hands-on learning.)

*To help our children understand how the world of “academia” relates to the world around us; how religion relates to the world around us, and how academia and religion are used in the adult world.  (Everything is political, and everything is religious.)

*To teach our children how to research and learn about the things they don’t know; to grow life-long learners.

*To help our children love to learn.

5. What is a well-educated person like?

 We want our children to be well rounded academically, well spoken and well read.  We want our children to understand how events in history are inter-related to each other.  We want children who can think for themselves.   But we feel that our children’s success is measured not only in academic excellence, but also by the kind of people they become when they are “educated”.  We want our children to become Christians, to think like Christians, and be persons of good character who LIVE for the Lord.

Now I know that homeschooling does not guarantee this outcome.  God gives children a free will, and some children raised in loving, Christian homes will reject the truth.  But if we do all we can to bring up our children “in the way they should go”, we will be fulfilling our Biblical responsibilities as parents, and we will be able to claim God’s promises regarding our children (Prov. 22:6, John 10:28, Isa 54:13.)

6.  How do children learn?

Every child learns differently, and homeschooling allows us to individualize our curriculum and methods to fit each child.  Institutional schools, by nature, cannot do this–they must “teach to the masses”. Parents have the unique opportunity to encourage and nurture each child’s own special abilities and interests–and many times these interests become future career paths.

I have always believed that:

1. Learning needs to wait for developmental readiness; learning must be individualized.

2. Learning takes time. Time to create and play, time to mature and develop fine-motor skills and the attention span; time to learn patience, endurance and determination.

3. Learning doesn’t always follow pre-determined grade level guidelines—in some areas, your child might be “ahead”, in others, “behind”; even so,  readiness and mastery are still key and they are worth waiting for. Learning MUST be individualized.

4. Learning is not limited to “academic” pursuits.  There are numerous spiritual, social, and life-skills to be taught.

5. Children retain more knowledge if they are actively involved in their own learning. Learning is often best internalized and reinforced through play and hands on activities, when possible.

6. There should be a balance of seatwork, service, work and play (this principle is laid down in the book, Home Grown Kids by Raymond and Dorothy Moore.)

7. Children need repetition and practice if they are to develop mastery.

8. Children need a core of simple, basic knowledge about their world, and the vocabulary that goes with it, before reading skills are taught. Children need a frame of reference to understand what they are reading.

9. Learning should proceed logically—from the familiar to the new, from the general to the specific, from the concrete to the abstract. Start with the world your children already know, and work your way out from there.

10. Much of early learning is simply laying a foundation for later, more in-depth learning.  It is a time to build a basic understanding about our world.  This means that during the early years, especially up until grade 4-5), you don’t have to worry as much about retention except in the areas of mastery (the three R’s-reading, writing, and arithmetic.)  We don’t expect young children to remember all of the dates and events of history, for example, but we do expect them to master their phonics, reading, writing, spelling, vocabulary, math facts, etc. Later learning uses earlier learning as a foundation to build upon; during this time, children are expected to put events in order, remember more names and dates, and understand the causes, effects and relationships of events, and so on.

11. In my humble opinion, learning from textbooks can be boring, but “real” books educate just as well, if not better—while retaining interest and enthusiasm.  (We have found that we used a unit study approach during the early years, but have edged back a little towards textbooks as our children entered high-school….I want them to know how to study textbooks as college preparation.  The point is, don’t rely solely on textbooks, or learning can be dull, boring and soon forgotten).

~Susan

© 2010, 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved. Portions of this post are exerpted from Homepreschool and Beyond and are used with permission. Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author.

Making the Decision to Homeschool: Questions To Ask Yourself if You Are Considering Homeschooling (Part 3)

    Here are my answers to questions 2 and three:

2. Does the Lord have anything to say about how and where your children are educated? Yes!  When I  started to research what the Bible has to say about children—how they should be educated, and what they should be taught—I was  amazed to see that the Bible really has a lot to say about the subject.  It is a shame that most Christian parents don’t bother to look.  A few of my favorite verses about education are:

Deut. 6: 5-8- YOU shall love the Lord YOUR God with all YOUR heart, and with all YOUR soul, and with all YOUR strength.  And these words which I command YOU shall be in YOUR heart.  YOU shall teach them diligently to YOUR children, and shall talk of them when YOU sit in YOUR house, when YOU walk by the way, when YOU lie down, and when YOU rise up. (NKJ)

             This says to me, YOU shall teach them…ALL THE TIME.

Proverbs 22:6-Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.  (NKJ)

           A commandment with a wonderful promise!  We cling to that promise daily. 

 Luke 6: 40- A student is not above his teacher but everyone who is fully trained will be like his teacher.  (NIV)

            Are you familiar with your child’s teacher, and the curriculum s/he  is teaching? Do you want your children become like their teachers?

  Ps. 127:3- Lo, children are a heritage of the Lord; the fruit of the womb is a reward.  (KJV)

            Children are a gift, and a pleasure to be around if they are properly trained.  Being with them all day is not boring, or a burden; it is a blessing.

 3 John 1: 4- I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in truth.  (NAS)

             Are your children being taught truth? 

 1 Tim. 1:5- But the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart, and a good conscious and a sincere faith. (NAS)

             Is this the goal of your child’s school?

 Ps. 111: 10- The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; the knowledge of the Holy is understanding”. (NIV)

             All wisdom and knowledge begins with God, and relates to Him.  Are your children being taught o compartmentalize their lives, relating only parts of their lives to God, or are they being taught to center their lives, learning, and decisions on what he Lord would have them do?

 2 Cor. 10: 5- Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ. (KJV)

         The “knowledge” of man is often in conflict with the knowledge of God.  Are we allowing our children to be taught ungodly imaginations? Are we allowing our children to be taught philosophies and theories that are contrary to the word of God, or that exalt themselves over Him?   Or are we teaching them to put worldly things aside, and make their very thoughts captive to Him?

 Col. 2: 8- Beware, lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world and not after Christ.  (KJV)

              Do we keep our children in government schools because of a fear of men—a fear of what others will think of us?  Are we afraid to step away from the traditions of men, sacrificing our children to be “spoiled” by the philosophies of man, instead?

1 Cor. 15:33- Be not deceived; bad company corrupts good morals. (NASB) -and- Proverbs 13:20- He who walks with the wise becomes wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm. (NIV)

             Socialization is either positive or negative.  Children are foolish—and often not good company for each other—they do not “socialize” each other very well. Bad company produces negative socialization, and corrupts the morals of our children. School is an artificial, age-segregated environment that often leads children to develop a “pack” or “pecking order” mentality—which is unkind and unchristian.  Children also tend to adopt the culture of their classmates, rejecting the culture of their own family.

Home is the natural environment; a safe haven where our children can safely be civilized by their own families.   Social graces and skills can be taught as well as caught, and our children will learn to be comfortable around people of all ages and all races as they experience living in the real world with their parents. There is no “generation gap” for homeschoolers; your culture is your child’s culture.

What kind of culture are your children a part of? What will be your children’s culture when they are grown?  What kind of manners and morals are your children catching?

When my husband and I researched homeschooling we, as many families before us, began to feel lead—no, called—to homeschool our children.  Look up the scriptures in the article, “Biblical Reasons to Homeschool” for a more complete list of the scriptures that address parenting and education– and see what the Lord says to you.

3.  Who do children belong to?  Who has (or should have) the final word on how or where your children are educated?  Who should control the content of your child’s education?

Our children don’t really belong to us at all; our children belong to God. They are His gift… on loan to us.  So we cannot always do what is easiest for us to do, but we must do what God would have us do as parents.

Imagine that instead of giving birth to our children, they were handed over to us by the Lord Jesus Himself.  Imagine yourself kneeling before Him…and He  hands you this tiny, squirmy bundle.  What do you think He would say to you?  What would you say to Him?  Perhaps would say, “Here is my child.  You may borrow him for a short time.  Take good care of Him; teach and train Him well.  I expect him to know Me when I return for him.” We don’t think of our children that way, but it reality that is just what the Lord has done for us by blessing us with children.  He has entrusted an eternal soul to our keeping.  What type of school would the Lord want our children to attend? Which type of school is best for our children’s eternity?

“God places children in families; families are where they belong.  Children do not belong to the “society” at large, nor the ‘state’. The Bible states clearly that our children are loaned to us, and that God still considers them to be His. God gives parents both the authority and the responsibility over their children’s education.”  (Klicka, The Heart of Homeschooling.)

Yes, our children are a gift from God.  It is our responsibility to educate our children in a way that honors Him.  Knowing that every idle word our child is exposed to, every philosophy and “theory” taught as fact, every fact omitted, every bit of the content of our children’s education is our responsibility—is a frightening thought.

“Many parents have concluded that it is actually easier to teach their children at home than it is to spend hours deprogramming and re-teaching the truth.” (paraphrased from Klicka, The Heart of Homeschooling.)

A Child of Mine  I will lend you, for a little time, A child of mine, He said. For you to love the while he lives, And mourn for when he’s dead. It may be six or seven years, Or twenty-two or three. But will you, till I call him back, Take care of him for Me? He’ll bring his charms to gladden you, And should his stay be brief, You’ll have his lovely memories, As solace for your grief. I cannot promise he will stay, Since all from earth return. But there are lessons taught down there, I want this child to learn. I’ve looked the wide world over, In search for teachers true. And from the throngs that crowd life’s lanes, I have selected you. Now will you give him all your love, Nor think the labour vain. Nor hate me when I come To take him home again? I fancied that I heard them say, ‘Dear Lord, Thy will be done!’ For all the joys Thy child shall bring, The risk of grief we’ll run. We’ll shelter him with tenderness, We’ll love him while we may, And for the happiness we’ve known, Forever grateful stay. But should the angels call for him, Much sooner than we’ve planned. We’ll brave the bitter grief that comes, And try to understand. -Edgar A. Guest

The statistics show that only 15% of children from evangelical Christian families who attend public school will believe in Jesus after high school; 94%
of homeschooled children will.  Will your child grow up to be a Christian? 

If we are honest with ourselves, we cannot escape the fact that public schools are no longer a safe place for children academically, physically, or most important of all, spiritually. …Parents may choose to delegate the authority to train their children to someone else (an institution), but they can never delegate the responsibility…Many of us take this responsibility so seriously that we believe we must retain the authority by homeschooling our children and being their primary teachers. -The Heart of Homeschooling, by Christopher Klicka.

 

        Who has (or should have) the final word on how or where your children are educated?  Who should control the content of your child’s education?

             Since children belong to parents, not the state, of course parents should have the final word on how and where their children are educated. However, not every government agrees with this.  Many countries believe that the society at large should have a say in how children are raised, so that the children grow
up to be “proper citizens” who THINK the right way (worldview).

Sadly, this type of thinking is becoming more and more prevalent in our society.  Many of the government school curriculums today are becoming less “fact” oriented, and more “thought” oriented.  Outcome-based education is all about teaching our children how to think—what type of attitudes to have about the world, government, personal rights, and even religion…often the “outcome” that is expected is with direct odds with Christian values.  Coming to a school
near you:  “Gay pride” day, mental health screenings, internationally set “benchmark” standards, and much more.

Recent laws require the government schools to downplay the traditional family, and promote alternative lifestyles.  These lifestyles are presented a perfectly normal and acceptable.  Any dissenting voices are considered to be “intolerant hate-speech”. Recently, here in California, the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals ruled that when parents place their children in a public school, they forfeit any right to determine what or how their children are taught.  In many areas, parents don’t even have the right to “opt out” of lessons they deem inappropriate.

It is vital, now more than ever, that parents maintain control of the CONTENT of their children’s education, lest children be taught, and come to believe, lies.  The issues of sexual education and indoctrination, evolution, humanism, religion, civics and government, and worldview demand it.

Parents are responsible to God for the content of their child’s education. Those who are responsible should make the final decisions about what is best for their child. No amount of pressure from friends, family or the government should change this.

© 2010, 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved. Portions of this post are exerpted from Homepreschool and Beyond and are used with permission. Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author.

Making the Decision to Homeschool: What Is Education, Anyway?! Questions to Ask Yourself if You are Considering Homeschooling (Part Two)

         Here is my answer to question number one, “What is education? ”

Dictionary Definitions : 

American Dictionary of the English Language, Noah Webster, 1828:  Educate:  The bringing up, as of a child; instruction and discipline which is intended to enlighten the understanding, correct the temper, form the manners and habits of youth, and fit them for usefulness in their future stations.  To give children a good education in manners, arts and science is important; to give them religious education is indispensable; and an immense responsibility rests on parents and guardians who neglect these duties.

Thorndike and Barnhart Junior Dictionary, 1965:
Educate:  Teach, to send to school.  Education:  Schooling, teaching; changing a person’s nature.

Grosset Webster Dictionary, 1974:  Educate: To instruct; inform and enlighten; indoctrinate.

Webster’s Encyclopedia of Dictionaries, 1978:
Educate:  To cultivate and discipline the mind and other faculties by teaching; send to school.

Webster’s New World Dictionary, 1988:  Educate: To train or develop knowledge, skill, mind, or character of, esp. by formal schooling or study; teach; instruct.

What a difference there is between the earliest and latest definitions!  In 1828, education included discipline, academics, manners, habit development, and religious instruction; you should also note that the responsibility for education clearly rested on the parents. Later definitions leave out the discipline, manners, habit development, religious instruction and the parents! Education has been turned over to the government.  Furthermore, later definitions reveal a bit about modern education’s true intentions: Changing a person’s nature, and indoctrination.  Standards for education nowadays often include more than just academic standards; current educational goals now include the areas of mental health, attitude, personality development, “societal values” and
sexual identity (Outcome Based Education, or Anti-Bias Curriculum, it is called).  Mass produced education seeks to produce a certain “product”; a person who acts and thinks in a certain way.  Need more proof?  Check this out:

From the Encyclopedia Britannica, online version:

Education can be thought of as the transmission of the values and accumulated knowledge of a society. In this sense, it is equivalent to what social scientists term socialization or enculturation. Children…are born without culture. Education is designed to guide them in learning a culture, molding their behaviour in the ways of adulthood, and directing them toward their eventual role in society.

Parents should also be aware that government-provided education is never religiously neutral, even if it claims to be.  Every curriculum/philosophy flouts its own worldview, as does every teacher.  A worldview devoid of God is called humanism—a religion unto itself.  I always tell my children that “everything is
religious, and everything is political.”

Ask yourself: Whose values are being transmitted to my children?

Important Quotes About Education

Noah Webster:  “An education without the Bible is useless.”

From Humanist Magazine:  “I am convinced that the battle for humankind must be waged and won in the public school classroom by teachers who correctly perceive their role as the proselytizers of a new faith:  a religion of humanity that recognizes and respects the spark of what theologians call divinity in every human being.  These teachers must embody the same selfless dedication as the most rabid fundamentalist preachers, for they will be ministers of another sort, utilizing a classroom instead of a pulpit to convey humanist values in preschool, daycare, or large university.  The classroom must, and will become an arena of conflict between the old and the new—the rotting corpse of Christianity, together with all its old adjacent evils and misery, and the new faith of humanism.”

In Wisdom’s Children by Blair Adams and Joel Stein:  “For Christian parents to deliberately send their children to such schools makes no more sense than sending them to Buddhist monasteries or Shiite Muslim academies, or more to the point, Nazi schools. Christian children did not become “witnesses” when they donned the brown shirt and joined the Hitler Youth Movement and attended Nazi schools:  The Nazis brainwashed and converted them by sending them to the seminaries of rival religious creeds.  We do not strengthen their beliefs by indoctrinating them during the most impressionable years of their lives in the values of the religious system antagonistic to Christianity.”

John Taylor Gatto, Teacher of the Year, 1990: “It is absurd and anti-life to move from cell to cell at the sound of a gong for every day of your natural youth in an institution that allows you no privacy and even follows you into the sanctuary of your home demanding that you do its
“homework.” “How will they learn to read?!” you say, and my answer is, “Remember the lessons of Massachusetts.” When children are given whole live instead of age-graded ones in cellblocks, they learn to read, write, and do arithmetic with ease if those things make sense in the kind of life that unfolds around them…FAMILY is the main engine of education. If we use schooling to break children away from parents, we’re going to continue to have the horror show we have right now. The curriculum of FAMILY is at the heart of any good life; we’ve gotten away from the curriculum—time to return to it. Experts in education have never been right. Their “solutions” are expensive, self-serving, and always involve further centralization. Enough … time for a return to democracy, individuality, and family.”

Brad Heath states in the book, Millstones and Stumbling Blocks:  “Some parents are worried about the public school environment, but concern over the somewhat unlikely chance of our children being physically assaulted should pale in comparison to the absolute certainty of assault on their Christian faith and beliefs. It is not the improbable violence to their body but the assured violence to their mind and spirit that constitutes the clear and present danger of public schooling. Few Christian parents have lost their children to public school violence, but multitudes have lost their kids spiritually, intellectually, and philosophically by ignoring the real threats these schools pose.”

Martin Luther said of schools: “I am much afraid that the schools will prove to be the gates of hell, unless they diligently labor in explaining the Holy Scriptures and engraving them in the hearts of youth.  I advise no one to place his child where the Scriptures do not reign paramount.  Every institution in which men are not unceasingly occupied with the Word of God must be corrupt.”

Dr. Cornelius Van Til wrote:  “If you say you are involved in the struggle between Christ and Satan in the area of family and in the church, but not in the school, you are deceiving yourself….You cannot expect to train intelligent, well-informed soldiers of the cross of Christ unless the Christ is held up before men as the Lord of culture as well as the Lord of religion.  It is the nature of the conflict between Christ and Satan to be all-comprehensive.”

 

        So, what is education? The best definition of education I’ve ever seen is the first:

Education is ANYTHING that: Corrects the temper Enlightens the understanding Forms the manners and habits of youth. Prepares them for usefulness in their future stations. -Webster’s 1828 Dictionary

I think we can  agree that education, as we’ve come to know it today, encompasses certain skills—such as a proficiency in mathematics, reading, writing and speaking as well as base of knowledge in various disciplines including literature, history, science, geography and the arts that (I would hope) most adults have mastered or at least been exposed to. I would add thinking skills and research skills to the list, so that my children will know how to “look up” topics that were skipped and/or not mastered; social skills, which can be systematically taught (manners and the Golden rule); and life skills, which the government schools seem to ignore altogether. Most important to me, however, is religious teaching and training and the development of a Christian worldview  (seeing things the way the LORD would see them; thinking HIS thoughts after HIM).

In contrast, the government schools teach the religion of humanism (that man is the all in all, and has no need of God for salvation; man can ‘save’ himself through his own accomplishments; that “religion” is a private, separate, compartmentalized part of life, but not all of life).  Schools also teach moral relativism (there are no real moral absolutes; what is right for you is ok, as long as you don’t ‘hurt’ anyone else), and that science and religion are self-exclusive (they don’t mix, and don’t need to be rectified to each other.) But I want my children to know absolute truth, and how to discern it.  Truth is a relative term to many, but I want my children to know that there is absolute truth!

What is your definition of “education”?  

~Susan  

© 2010, 2011 Susan Lemons all rights reserved. Portions of this post are exerpted from Homepreschool and Beyond and are used with permission. Copyrighted materials may not be re-distributed or re-posted without express permission from the author.